Happy New Year friends, it's me again! Don't you just love how I come and go? I will admit, I can be a fickle person. I often find myself becoming easily excited about a new endeavor, continue by putting everything I have into it, only to find myself extremely overwhelmed. Just as quickly as I picked up this new interest I also would drop it due to burnout. This past year I did A LOT of personal reflection. I spent many of my early mornings sitting in the presence of the Lord in my prayer closet asking Him to show me who I am through His eyes. Asking Him to help me break down chains of bondage in order to have a truly genuine and intimate relationship with Him. I came to realize that so many of these “new endeavors” I was pursuing were actually things I was using to fill voids as tools to give me purpose. No wonder I would get overwhelmed and burned out. I so desperately wanted to know my true worth and value through His eyes and to realize that my purpose comes from the Lord and not in the hobbies I pick up. Don’t get me wrong, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with having interests, hobbies, endeavors, etc. but the reason for them can be the issue. Instead of looking to the Lord to find my value and worth, I was looking at worldly desires that I thought would make me feel complete, fulfilled, successful and purposeful.
Looking back at 2018, I can conclude, it was indeed a year of spiritual growth for me. In those early morning quiet times, I began to write using a specific type of journal style called S.O.A.P (Scripture, Observation, Application, Prayer). Things the Lord revealed to me through these dedicated quiet times were amazing. I have decided to post many of them here on my blog Mom Matters Most. Some of them are encouraging truths while others may shake you to your core (as they did me when I was writing them). Here's the thing though, I wrote these while I was completely alone with the Holy Spirit. They are raw and real. There may be things that offend but that's okay. Even Jesus offended people. My hope is that God would lead those who need to read the words written and not one person more.
I have come to realize that one of the most important things we can learn in this life is that what the world thinks is not nearly as important as what God thinks. We must have an eternal perspective to discern between the two. I am consistently reminding myself that although many people will not understand some of my choices or actions, it is not them with whom my worth comes from. I try to surrender each day to Him while seeing through the lens of eternity, This is a DAILY surrender, and often a moment by moment surrender. It is HARD and some days are better than others, but going into 2019 my prayer is that I’m able to surrender more each day than I did the last.
My plan for Mom Matters Most in 2019 is to post one devotional per week. My desire is to offer encouragement, hope and most importantly TRUTH!
I'd like to say a special thank you to Marlee Melbert for typing my horribly handwritten journal entries for me!
Reference: Most of my journal entries were derived from a scripture or passage reading in my NIV bible. I would then use my Study Bible to reread those same scriptures in order to know more about the setting of the time while diving deeper into their meaning.